He looked at her patiently.
She stared down, afraid to look into his eyes.
"This cannot happen. It is not right", she said.
"What is not right?"
She looked up to explain but the confidence in his eyes made her feel shaky.
Never she had lost a case but today she was unable to win her argument. Unable to make him understand the gravity of things, frustrated she left in a huff.
"Hey......what happened?"
"Am going. Just go away."
"Why? What happened?........Where are you going?"
He moved towards her. She walked away fast.
Hey wait. Why are you running away?
He shouted with tears in his eyes, "Why are you running away from the truth? Are you afraid to fall in love AGAIN or afraid to fall in love with someone younger to you."
She stopped. STUNNED by the truth.
P.S. I tried to write this fiction though am not good at story writing. Don't know whether it was predictable right from the beginning or i was able to hold the surprise a bit. Its been inspired by one of the serials i had seen (can't remember the the title of the serial) when at home about the concept of an older girl falling in love with a younger guy. Do let me know your views about this piece. Suggestions are welcome. Love is in the air. Wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day in advance.
48 comments:
Certainty (in your note..predictable) does not wipe off splendour of uncertainty that it holds within it..that's beauty in creations..of thoughts, of knowledge, of life as a whole. Death is the finality...a certainty for life; yet it allows life to experience each moment of uncertainty..
I enjoyed the concept, context and loved it for a quite mature approach in consideration of your age. Moreover, the flair I always find admirable in you.
Regards,
@ Saibal Burman,
Thanks!! for your encouraging words and the admiration. It means a lot to me.
but you won the case.
Its gr8888 ...
Its nice to be here on your page.
Hey Shas,
Its a very nice try. Please keep thinking and writing. :)
I also try to write stories. Browse through these :
http://fakegaurav.blogspot.com/search/label/Stories
You may like some of them.
Well I believe there is no limitations in true love.. age, looks, status, nothing matters..but yes true love cant be mean too.. we never want our loved one to compromise on anything.. I think understand that girl's thinking n feeling.. not her fault nor either that guy's fault.. he just need to make her convince n assured abt his true feelings for her and bring her out of any such complex..
Great writing.. :))
Happy Valentines Day to you too:))
Take care
ooh nice one... totally unexected... I was thinking on the side of legal stuff... Got diverted by the pic I guess!
Nice try and have a gr8 valentines
hey..this is really a good one..its unpredictable..i really thought the case she has lost was something normal..i never thought its about being in love with someone younger than you...its so cute..i like the surprising end :3
( / ・ω・)//!!!
(P.S. if you'll reply to this comment..pls. put it in my blog's comment box so that i can update my comments :D)
@ Makk,
Thanks!! Its always a pleasure to see u here. Keep visiting!!
@ Gaurav,
Hi! Thanks for encouraging me. Will surely check out ur stories.
@ Sam,
Rightly said. Love surpasses all human boundaries.
Wish u too a Happy Valentines Day!!
@ Saurabh,
Hi hi...that was a deliberate trick. Thanks! Wish u2 a Happy Valentines Day!!
@ Ayu,
Thanks! AM glad u liked the surprise ending.
Ah what a nice post...although I would've liked it to be a li'l longer.The premise of an older woman-younger man romance needs to be explored more often..it's high time the society shed it's scruples regarding this matter.
Well , its nice ..and wrote it well .. and until we don't try how one will be explore the hidden talent ..residing inside..
so keep writing..
Wow! I'm soooo glad to see so many people FOR older women-younger men relationships! If ur wondering why then it's cuz i'm one of them..Me and my guy have been together for 2years now and yea, he is younger than me by more than just a couple of years - but it doesn't matter at all - atleast not to us...What the future holds for us, we are yet to see but right now this is good - nope, the best!
It is a good attempt at fiction :-)
@ Samadrita,
Thanks! I too hope that society opens up for this and accepts it.
Vivek,
Thanks!
@ Raaji,
Thanks!
@ Preeti,
Thanks n Welcome to my space. After reading your comment i feel that it was worth writing on this topic. Am so happy for you that things are going on really well and age hardly matters in ur relationship. Wishing the best for the two of u n a looong life to ur relationship.
Cheers!
A Very honest attempt at story writing... Definitely the Suspense is retained till the end....
Your inspiration behind the story is really interesting..
Keep writing.. Looking forward for more entertainment.. :)
Cheers
Kash...
arey good one.. :)
hey keep on writing you are good or may i say great i loved the concept but remain confused for the end hope you have thought of it . best of luck and happy valentines day in return.
It wasnt predicatable...made for a good read. keep up the good work!!
:D
well, dats really a nice fiction write-up........
the surprise is kept till d end, coz dere cn be many things dat cn b behind dis surprise......
but with tym u vl become much more gud in fiction......
@ Ashwin,
Thanks! this was one of the first few attempts at fiction. Hope i get better with each attempt n am able to entertain u all.
I dnt kno how right it wud b to say dat i was inspired by it but i definitely got the idea frm there... :D
@ Arpit,
Welcome n thanks!!
@ Sleeping Beauty,
Thanks!! I havn't thought of the ending. I hav left it to the readers imagination.
Wish ya too a Happy valentines Day!!
@ Shalini,
Thanks! am glad i didnt gv out the suspense.
@ The Aspirant,
Thanks!! Ya i hope that i improve with each attempt.
You had preserved the surprise at the end. But I believe the short story will have more substance if you would try to describe more the characters. Like, if the guy's wearing jeans, what's his facial features and the like ;)
Hi Shas,
I think this fiction is pretty good... not so bad for first timer... i've never tried the same and will definitely won't try it anymore coz it's so complicated... so, i salute you for giving a shot... cheers!!!:)
Good day!!! and Happy Valentines!!!:)
>Kelvin
nicely written!
Brilliant. Loved it... I remember the ad for this serial.
And I feel older women and younger men are as likely to have a happy relationship as older men, younger women.
Interesting ... a bit "hard hitting" kind of stuff
Beautiful Write Up :) :)
@ Minnierunner,
Thanks for the suggestions. Will keep them in mind next time. Actually i was trying 100 word fiction but i exceeded my word limit so i left it like that. I had no intention of expanding on the theme or the plot-line. If i will get more ideas then i may elaborate on the storyline.
=)
It was a nice attempt...... n yeah..the end was not predictable bt ur PS was even more unexpected..some serial plot...Lol... :D :D
Keep writing :)
love the way you have written :)
@ Window Lad,
Thanks for the encouragement. Hey do try it sometime, dnt giv up so easily :)
@ Tarun Sharma,
Thanks!!
@ Indianhomemaker,
Thanks!! Friend.
@ Nik,
Yaa, Thanks!!
@ Creativity,
Thanks!! :)
@ Smirithi Rao,
Thanks!!
very nicely told - you did well...though i belong to that old generation where the male should be older or equal in age to the female..but then i admit to having my own silly notions at time :P
@ UL,
Thanks! for sharing ur thoughts.
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